Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Randomize
