just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
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