Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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