Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
