We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
