I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
