I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
