2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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