Dual....:-)
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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