I saw his package. It spoke to me.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
