We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I forgot how hot balto sounded
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
