this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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