I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Randomize