Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
