so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
