why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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