just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
