office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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