So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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