Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
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