I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
