He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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