Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
