what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
