their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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