Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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