There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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