i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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