4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
