Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
this boner is exhausting
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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