its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize