Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize