I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Randomize
