Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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