who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
