I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
