This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize
