I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
