is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
The struggles of a small town man whore
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
