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I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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