Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
