these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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