O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize