apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
