I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize