some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
two words: eviction party
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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