please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
