perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
COCAINE IS GR8
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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