its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize