so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Randomize
