who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
